He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize
