she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
