I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
