At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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