How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
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