Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
How's work?
Spinning.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
