The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
