I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
