Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
