So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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