Non-Jews are for practice
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
