I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
