That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
