I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
They took my balls.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
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