I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
Randomize
