...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
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