Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
this hospital has no fireball
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize