Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize