Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I think I won the penis lottery.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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