The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Randomize
