Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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