Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
Randomize