She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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