this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Randomize
