Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
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