I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
we're making bets on your personal life
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
