Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Randomize
