I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
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