I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
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