I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
tell me about the eggs
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
