Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize
