okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
