yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Randomize
