Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
is wine microwaveable?
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
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