so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Randomize
