Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
