New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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