let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
