Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
