Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Randomize
