how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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