I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize