you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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