I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
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