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• (925): View more from California

  is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her

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• (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.

  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Four. Poor grandma...

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• (701): View more from North Dakota

  Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize

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• (831): View more from California

  It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.

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• (608): View more from Wisconsin

  I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent

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• (407): View more from Florida

  Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.

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• (606): View more from Kentucky

  I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."

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• (541): View more from Oregon

  Sounds like sex on a twister board.

  (1-541): View more from Oregon

  An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...

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• (765): View more from Indiana

  Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.

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• (818): View more from California

  Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance

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• (803): View more from South Carolina

  We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it

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• (613): View more from Ontario

  Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast

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