hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
well most of my day revolves around power hour
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
