that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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