I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
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