Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
