why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
